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Getting Out In A Bad Relationship

Author: My Relationship Tips

So, you thought you have finally found the ONE.

Someone who has an established career, with stable financial status, responsible, good looking, intelligent, and good-humored person has finally come into your life.

But, just when you thought you've finally met the ideal man or woman of your dreams, everything seems to be wrong and complicated. Suddenly, he has lost his job, she went bankrupt, he became careless, and she became paranoid about everything. You try to help your partner in dealing with the issues but it always turns out that he or she's too good to ask help from anybody-even you.

Still, despite everything you still do almost everything to help your beau without you realizing that he or she slowly drags you into the pit of depression and helplessness they're in. When you feel that you are no longer healthy, happy, and growing in the relationship, that's the time when you are trapped in bad relationship.

Being stuck and stranded

It is always hard to end any kind of relationship-especially if it's a romantic relationship. But, no matter how hard to end something that you thought is precious, you should know when to end a relationship especially if you are well-aware that its not doing you any good.

The signs of the times would probably tell you if you are already being stuck in a bad relationship. Experts agree that the relationship is already bad when the couple is going through unusual periods of disagreement and bitterness that can be evitable in some relationships. You will also know if you are already in the pit of a bad relationship when it involves incessant aggravation and everything-even your partner-seems to be out of your reach.

The main determinant if you are in a bad relationship is the behavior of your partner. You can tell that you are being caught up in a bad relationship if your partner is beyond your reach of communication and comprehension, he or she doesn't want to make any commitment, doesn't profess his or her feelings even if there is a sort of commitment or plainly incapable of loving someone else besides him or herself.

Studies also show that in any bad relationship, the couple is often on dissimilar wavelengths that there is almost no common ground and no connection or communication that result to irritation and disappointment.

Since bad relationships usually stem from chronic reciprocation of what one or both partners need, the relationship itself can even damage the self-esteem of the persons involved. Bad relationships are also destructive for persons especially those who have invested so much in their careers for their personal lives since these serve as a perfect breeding ground for rage, bitterness, self-doubt, melancholy, and distress.

Aside from emotional distress, staying in a bad relationship can be hazardous to someone's health. The most common hazard of bad relationship is the physical harm caused by an abusive partner. In less severe cases, being in a bad relationship can cause tensions and various chemical changes often triggered by so much stress.

Being in a bad relationship reflects so much on the person's overall health and well-being because it can drain energy, thus, lowering the body's resistance to illness. The common health hazards of being in a bad relationship include severe headaches, back pains, and stomachaches caused by anger and frustration; insomnia and melancholy caused by emotional distress; and weight problems caused by irregular behavioral patterns and depression.

If couples continue to be in a relationship that is no longer healthy, they will try to find a way to escape from being stuck inside by being alcoholic or drug dependent. Worse, being stuck in an unhealthy relationship can eventually lead to recurrent suicide attempts.

Breaking free

What most people inside relationships do not realize is that the more they try to work things out, things get more and more complicated. This is because both people in the relationship try so hard to pass through the stage without realizing that they are detaching themselves with their respective partners. As a result of this detachment is misunderstanding, incompatibility, and soon enough, falling out of love.

If you are already in a bad relationship that robs you off your freedom to be yourself, the freedom to love other person, and the freedom to get out of an unhealthy and destructive relationship, here are some of the things you can do to recover.

1. Consider your wellness as the first priority in life whether you are in or out of a romantic relationship.

2. Try to be "selfish" at times by focusing on your own needs above all else.

3. Be strong enough to deal with your own problems.

4. Have a positive outlook in life and cultivate whatever positive values you acquired within the relationship.

5. Nurture you spiritual side and try to look for ways or activities that can bring you inner peace.

6. If the relationship was quite traumatic, think of getting professional help or find a support group where you can chare your experiences and the lessons you have learned.

7. Don't be afraid to fall in love but try to be more cautious next time so you won't be stuck in a bad relationship.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/getting-out-in-a-bad-relationship-236533.html

About the Author
My Relationship Tips has hundreds of relationship and dating articles for men and women.

Healthy Relationship, Healthy Self: Build a Stronger Connection Through Self-intimacy

Author: Richard Nicastro, Ph.D.

Intimacy is all about connection--the feeling that you and your partner are kindred spirits. The hallmark of a healthy marriage or relationship is feeling close and attuned to your partner, but maintaining this connection isn't always easy. Therefore, finding ways to enhance intimacy is a priority for all couples.

Self-intimacy: A prerequisite to interpersonal intimacy

You are probably in many different relationships: with acquaintances, friends, family, coworkers, to name a few. When you think about the relationships in your life, does your relationship with yourself ever come to mind? Probably not, yet this relationship is central to all of your other relationships.

Self-intimacy is the experience of feeling connected to all of yourself--the parts of yourself you naturally embrace as well as the parts you wish didn't exist. This connection allows you to feel grounded--giving you an emotional center that anchors your experiences. This anchor has an important place in your relationship.

To get a better understanding of your relationship with yourself, reflect on the following questions: "How do I feel about myself? What do I like about myself? Dislike? Hate? Which parts of myself do I find easy to accept? Which parts make me feel uneasy or conflicted?" Your answers to these questions reflect the type of intimate relationship you have with yourself.

Self-Estrangement: A block to interpersonal intimacy

Unfortunately, you may not have access to important parts of yourself. Why? Because you can dislike a part (or parts) of yourself so intensely that you deny its existence. Your denial doesn't mean, however, that these parts do not surface in your relationship--they usually seek expression. When you ignore parts of yourself, you've left the realm of self-intimacy (a connection to yourself) and have entered the world of self-estrangement (a disconnection from yourself).

At one time or another we've all denied certain truths about ourselves, maybe with little consequence--truths that would make us feel vulnerable or ashamed, desperate or inadequate. However, when you're in a relationship, the consequences of self-estrangement are always significant. Why? Because you can never fully hide from your spouse or partner.

When self-intimacy is the norm, you'll be fully present and emotionally available to your partner. When self-estrangement rules your inner world, you will remain disconnected from yourself and your partner. Your relationship is robbed of intimacy whenever you close off aspects of yourself to your partner.

Self-estrangement in action:

The husband who cannot be vulnerable with his wife is self-estranged--he denies his vulnerable self. A wife who minimizes her outbursts is self-estranged--she denies her anger. The girlfriend who ignores her jealousy is self-estranged--she denies her insecurities.

For the last ten years, Chris has worked almost nonstop to become a successful attorney. His driven nature has served him well professionally and he recently made partner at his New York City law firm. To his dismay, Chris's work-related success has always eluded him in his personal relationships.

Chris complains that he often feels distant in his marriage, despite his wife Kendra's encouragement to be more open and share his feelings. Chris is estranged from any emotions that make him feel "weak" or vulnerable. It's his inability to connect with these parts of himself that continues to block intimacy in his marriage.

Chris's first step in breaking out of this self-estrangement pattern is to honestly assess his relationship with himself--in particular, the parts of himself that he wished didn't exist.

Are you ready to assess yourself?

Rate yourself and your relationship intimacy:

Using a scale from one (no intimacy) to ten (very satisfying levels of intimacy), rate the intimacy in your marriage or relationship.

If your rating is relatively high (8 or higher), than you probably don't struggle with self-estrangement. If your rating is relatively low (4 or lower), self-estrangement may be standing in the way of a deeper connection with your partner.

To help determine the impact that your level of self-intimacy has on your marriage or relationship, now rate yourself on the self-intimacy/self-estrangement continuum below:

Self-Intimacy-----------------------------------------------------Self-Estrangement

Pick a spot on this continuum that reflects how connected (or disconnected) you feel to yourself. Try to think about how self-connected you feel in general, since this may shift for you, depending on circumstances. If the spot you choose is closer to the self-intimacy end of the continuum, this means you feel grounded and are able to share yourself fully with your partner; if your spot is closer to the self-estrangement end, you feel disconnected and are unable to share yourself fully with your partner.

Rating yourself can feel a little daunting, so give yourself enough time to adequately reflect on these issues. If it does feel like self-estrangement is holding you (and your relationship) back from achieving the intimacy you desire, speak with someone who can give you support around this issue (your partner, a trusted friend or family member, a counselor). You've already taken an important step by assessing your level of self-intimacy.

Are you ready to build a stronger, more intimate relationship?

To receive FREE monthly tips on how to build the relationship of your dreams, visit http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and sign up for Dr. Nicastro's Relationship Toolbox Newsletter.

As a bonus, you will receive the popular free reports: "The four mindsets that can topple your relationship" and "Relationship self-defense: Control the way you argue before your arguments control you."

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/healthy-relationship-healthy-self-build-a-stronger-connection-through-selfintimacy-357973.html

About the Author

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a relationship coach and psychologist who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship. Rich is cofounder of LifeTalk Coaching, an Internet-based coaching business that helps couples strengthen their relationships.

Feeling Hopeless Over A Falling Apart Relationship?

Author: Jesus Uman

Is your relationship falling apart?  Is it getting worse, and you feel hopeless?  Has panic gripped you, and you're grasping for anything to help you?  The confusion, pain, and anger you experience when your relationship is falling apart, is one of the most devastating things to endure.  There is help to make it healthy, and you don't have to feel hopeless!  It can be fixed!

Everyone will have problems in their relationship, whether minor or major.  In your case, it's major,  you feel hopeless, and don't know what to do. Your sense of urgency has brought you here for your falling apart relationship.Take a deep breath it can be fixed!

Here are some facts what falling apart relationships lead to.  It's estimated that 50% of men under the age of 45 will divorce in their first time of marriage. For women, it is about 44% to 52% under the age of 45 who will divorce in their first time of marriage. For men, and women between the ages of 45 to 55, it is about 40% who will divorce. The lowest divorce rates are for men and women at 60 years of age, until death, at about 32%. Not good odds, are they?  Don't be a statistic!

How many people have you heard say that their relationship was over? You felt for them, you cried with them, and hoped that something like this won't happen to you.  But it did!  There are 5 extremely important areas that you need to focus on to help your falling apart relationship heal. Series of events led up to it.

1. Are you in love, or just love?

There are many ways to describe love, but concerning a relationship,  It's about being in love!  When you first fell in love, did it take your breath away, make your heart beat faster?  Did your knees knock, and left you shaky all over?   Life gets in the way with the business of making a living, taking care of family, and so on, and it has contributed to diminishing  the magic of being in love!  Re-kindle that magic!

2. Be committed to make your relationship work!

Are both of you committed to stop your relationship from falling apart?  If only one of you is willing to rebuild it, the odds are that it is bound to fail. Both of you will have to sit down, and discuss your willingness to make your falling apart relationship work.  There will be problems, and both of you will need to be willing to work on them, and see them through.

3. Learn how to communicate with each other again!

How many couples do you know who were madly in love in the beginning of their relationship? They talked about everything under the sun, and were excited with each others conversation.  Then time past, and you saw them again, both of them so quiet, you could hear a pin drop and hit the floor! Has your relationship reached that point? Communication won't be easy, because the relationship is already in trouble, but you keep trying.  It will get better!

4. Be willing to work on trust issues!

For a relationship to work, it has to be built on a foundation of trust! I don't know what kind of events went on in your home that led up to it falling apart, but if trust has been compromised, it will be a difficult issue to work on. Nobody is perfect, and we all make mistakes! It's when you do it again, that it isn't a mistake anymore, but an intention.

5. Rebuilding your relationship will take time.

Working on a relationship that is falling apart will take time. You have to be patient! It will not heal over night!   Keep in mind, that the damage is done, and you don't want to put a band-aid over a gaping wound!

Relationships that fall apart are difficult, and unfortunately, too many people give up. They end their relationships when there was a chance it could have been saved!  Yours can be!  You don't have to feel hopeless!

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/breakup-articles/feeling-hopeless-over-a-falling-apart-relationship-1421211.html

About the Author

My name is Jesus Uman, and I work in the Human Services field. I am a counselor who has seen too many relationships that could have been saved. I have worked with people from all walks of life, from individuals who come from well to do families, to individuals that were on the lower end of the social economic ladder, and relationship issues trouble everyone from time to time. I have the resources to help you! Why continue thinking what to do, when you can get help right away! Again, give yourself a break, and click the link below!
http://hubpages.com/hub/A-Broken-Marriage-How-to-Save-A-Broken-Marriage

How to Stop Fighting With your Partner Today

Author: Mailcucan

It's fair to say that most people avoid contact whenever they are faced with it especially in a relationship. Conflict and arguments make us feel weak and can cause us to feel badly about ourselves and our lives. If you find that you and your partner are constantly fighting, and you don't know what you do about it, maybe these tips will be able to help.

What are you fighting for?

There may be times when it seems like you're fighting about everything from the litter box to the bills, the way someone snores to how they put the towel on the floor after a shower. But what you might want to start to recognize is that not all fights are actually about anything important at all they're merely symbols of something larger. And it's that larger thing that you need to tackle in order to stop the fighting and arguing.

But how do you get to this larger issue? First of all, there are many psychological techniques that can help you, so there's no need to become frustrated before you even start. Some couples are able to sit down and talk about what frustrates them, but for those that can not, writing is an amazingly effective way to get your feelings out. What you can do is simply take five minutes to write until you run out of things to say. While you might not think that you can write for that long, you'll be surprised what happens once you get started. This free writing exercise allows your mind to switch off and allows the censors to be quiet so that you can release your real feelings about what is happening in your relationship.

Every day help

You may also want to try this exercise every morning when you first wake up. By writing down everything that is on your mind, you will keep it from becoming too 'full' and confused. Many people find that this exercise not only allows them to be calmer in their relationship, but that they can also find solutions to ongoing problems that come up. This is a long term tool that works for many couples.

Right now

If you want to diffuse your fighting today, you can do several things. First of all, it helps to step outside of your anger and your frustration by realizing what is really happening. Talk about the 'source' of your fighting as though it were happening to someone else. This might mean that you start to refer to each other in the third person (he or she) in order to fully separate yourself from the emotions that are occurring. You might also want to start talking in hushed tones to calm down your body physically so that your mind responds as well. It's hard to be upset when you're talking softly.

What are you getting out of fighting?

Another thing that you will want to consider is whether or not you're rewarding the other person for fighting with you, or if they are rewarding you. We only do things that bring us some sort of satisfaction, so what is the reward of all of your fighting? Think about what happens immediately after a fight. Do you head to the bedroom as a sort of reward for the fight being over? Do you talk lovingly to each other or go out and reward your selves in some other manner?

When you start to realize that pattern of your fighting, you might start to see that you are actually allowing it to continue to happen. Instead of making it something that isn't good for your relationship, you're creating the connection that if you fight, you will get something in return. To effectively stop the fighting and start uncovering what the source is, you need to stop rewarding the fighting itself. After a fight, you shouldn't do anything that makes it rewarding. Sit with each other, but try not to create any sort of reward unless you actually work through the problem that you have fought about.

Fighting isn't something that you can entirely avoid, but it is a signal that you should look more closely at your relationship and how you are managing it. By taking the time to write out your feelings and then discussing problems calmly, you won't have to start yelling in order to feel heard.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/how-to-stop-fighting-with-your-partner-today-67154.html

About the Author

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Healthy Relationship Program: Set Goals and Transform your Relationship

Author: Richard Nicastro, Ph.D.

Imagine your life without goals. That’s right: pretend you just wiped away every single goal imaginable—from the mundane sort like getting out of bed and brushing your teeth to the bigger variety, like making partner at the firm. I bet you can’t imagine it. Because without goals (the ones you consciously name and the ones you just carry out), our lives might feel like unstructured, amorphous stretches of time. Setting goals can direct, energize and motivate you. And meeting your goals is a tremendously rewarding experience.

Take a moment to jot down three goals that are important to you—things you want to achieve in your life.

Then think about which aspects of your life are most important to you—what you cherish most in life.

If you’re anything like the people I recently surveyed, then your goals include things like: making more money while working less, exercising more and losing weight (and keeping it off) and getting out of debt. Money and health topped the goal-setting list.

Then I asked these same individuals for a different type of list—a list of what they cherish most in life. Almost all discussed their relationship with their spouse or life partner. People and relationships topped the what’s-most-important-to-you list.

Relationship Goals are MIA:

Here’s what I find remarkable. The people I surveyed didn’t have any goals for what they cherish most in life—their relationship or marriage. When it comes to goal-setting, marriage is left at the curb. There’s a dangerous assumption lurking that a good relationship will take care of itself. The frequency of failed relationships tells us this assumption is dead wrong.

Your Relationship Roadmap: Create a vision

In order to create relationship goals, it’s important to have a vision that details the kind of spouse or partner you aspire to be as well as the type of relationship that is important to you and your partner—this picture should be consistent with your personal values. When your goals are out of sync with your values, you’ll find yourself stalled on the road to your relationship destination.

A set of relationship goals is a roadmap that lends direction to your relationship. If your relationship already meets your vision, then working to keep the relationship at this level can be your goal.

An exercise to help you create relationship goals:

Imagine that your partner has been hired to teach a class about you at UCLA. The syllabus is a written testament to the type of spouse or partner you’ve been throughout the history of your relationship. Not holding anything back, s/he will detail your strengths and weaknesses as a partner. The entire truth (as your partner sees it) will be unfurled for an eager audience motivated to learn all about you.

What do you imagine s/he will say about you?

Respond to this question as honestly as possible. If you find yourself resisting this exercise or focusing more on what you’d like your partner to say, you won’t establish any meaningful goals. Remember, this exercise is designed to help you take a realistic look at yourself as a partner, a necessary step in creating goals that will make a difference in your relationship or marriage. You will need to open yourself up to some truths that may sting. Take my word—it will be well worth it.

There’s relationship gold to be found in the gap:

There will be a gap between what you’d like your partner to convey in his/her lecture and what s/he would actually say. This gap contains valuable information that you’ll use to set up relationship goals. Keep in mind that establishing and reaching relationship goals means committing to changing your behavior. The focus should be on you and not what you believe your partner should do differently.

The guiding question is: How wide is this gap and what can you do to narrow it?

When you begin to take steps to answer this question, you start accumulating the information you need to create your relationship goals. Don’t rush this—it should be a process that you come back to over and over again.

Ready to discover more about relationship goal-setting and other practical ways to improve your relationship?

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/healthy-relationship-program-set-goals-and-transform-your-relationship-208066.html

About the Author

Find out how to create the relationship of your dreams: Sign up for the free Relationship Toolbox Newsletter at http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and immediately receive two FREE reports that will help you achieve your relationship potential.

Rich Nicastro, Ph.D. is a relationship coach who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship.

How To Save A Relationship

Author: Matt Olson

Going through a break up is one of the most traumatic experiences you can go through, especially if the two of you were very close at one time. This may sound overly dramatic, but it's a proven fact that losing a relationship creates a similar degree of grief as losing a loved one who dies. The pain is overwhelming at times. How many more sleepless nights can you take? Is there something you can do to repair the relationship? If you want to learn how to save a relationship but feel powerless to change things, you must learn exactly what to do and what not to do in order to increase your odds of a successful reunion.

Accepting that this is happening is the first step towards healing. Whatever you resist, persists. Accept that you are going to go through a certain degree of emotional pain instead of fighting it. You will immediately feel a "release" that will give you some relief. Saving a relationship means accepting that there are certain things you can change and certain things you can't. But the good news is you have more power than you may think.

If you're serious about learning how to save a relationship the first thing you must do is immediately stop any type of pushy, needy or "desperate" behavior. This includes arguing about the relationship, writing love letters, trying to convince your partner or ex, etc. The more you push, the more they will pull away... it's human nature. When you're the one chasing, you give away all your power... and that is unattractive.

The idea is to work with human nature instead of against it. You do this by giving the other person their space. If you are already broken up, this mean no contact for a while... no phone calls, emails, messages through mutual friends, nothing for at least a few weeks, even a month or so. If you are still together but the relationship is on the rocks, then of course zero contact is not practical. But giving your partner their space still applies.

By giving them their space, you show that you are no longer desperate and needy. You are no longer chasing them... and that will usually spark their interest again. Why? Because just like it's human nature to pull away if you feel pushed, the opposite is also true... a person tends to be drawn towards someone they think is not entirely available.

During this period of giving them their space, be sure to involve yourself in plenty of positive activities. Start working on those personal goals you've been putting off, do things that make you happy and improve your life. Your partner will see the difference. This combined with your new attitude of independence will almost always draw them towards you again. Now, instead of you being the one chasing, you're both equals... and you can begin to work on the deeper problems that need healing.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/how-to-save-a-relationship-837259.html

About the Author

Can you really save your relationship? Yes... Check out How To Save A Relationship for more free tips on EXACTLY how to get your loved one back in your arms fast.

Article Source: http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Save-a-Relationship---Heres-Exactly-What-to-Do-to-Save-a-Relationship&id=1333545

How to Keep Your Long-distance Relationship Going Strong

Author: Oleg Potemkin

You met someone great and you are in a serious dating relationship, but you live in a different city or town. Or perhaps you are married and have recently taken on a job that requires you to travel and you frequently stay overnight away from home.

How do you keep the romance in your long-distance relationship? How do you remain a ‘couple’ when you are often away from each other?

It takes some effort, but with a little forethought and dedication, you can keep the romance in your relationship while you are away.

AND…you can ensure that your ‘special someone’ will look forward to your return and welcome you with open arms!

If you are going on a trip and want to leave something for your partner to find, you can plan ahead and drop an item or a ‘care package’ on the bed or in the kitchen before you leave. If you’d rather ‘send’ something from afar, you can do that too.

Be creative and you can come up with a lot of ideas on your own.

You can buy these items in advance and prepare the package to be mailed later, and then tuck the package(s) in your suitcase, OR you can buy the items on the road and mail the package back when you feel your partner needs a pick-me-up.

These packages don't have to be expensive or elaborate. It is the THOUGHT that counts.

Be sure you wrap fragile items well so they don't arrive broken, and be sure to put enough postage on the package so it doesn't get returned to you!

Here are some things to consider:

Write a short note for every day or for special dates, you will be gone, and place each note in an envelope. Write the date you want your partner to open the note on the front of each envelope.

If you know your husband has to make a big presentation at work on a certain day, write a note to boost his confidence and tell him you believe in him and label the note for him to open on that date.

You can mail the package with all the notes in it and your partner will look forward to opening each note while you are away!

Make or buy a calendar and write notes on the calendar for each day or for special days. Your partner can hang the calendar at home or in the office and she will be reminded that you are thinking of her every time she reads a note you've written.

Handmade, silly calendars with art work and drawings, or with pasted or taped pictures of you, or of ‘special places’ you’ve gone together are especially effective!

Even if you aren't a master artist of photographer, your partner will love the thought!

Include a personal item in the package (an earring, a comb, a cufflink or something that belongs to you. If it is part of a pair, and you keep the other part with you, the thought is even more romantic).

Include a non-perishable edible item (like a lollipop, or perhaps a small bag of trail mix if your spouse uses that for energy while biking or walking his exercise trail)

Make a CD of a song or songs you both love and send a copy with a romantic title or note.

Cut words or phrases out of the on board airline magazine and tape or glue them on the hotel stationary to make a funny or sweet love letter ‘from the road’.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/how-to-keep-your-longdistance-relationship-going-strong-346829.html

About the Author

Oleg Potemkin is a Founder of Custom
Love Songs - an Amazing & Unique Gift Of Love for Wedding, Engagement, Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Graduation and other special occasions.

Dating Tips and Advice - Guys Don't Need Them to Pick Up Women

Author: Amir Rimer

It seems to me that we are seeking success with women because we believe that if we are successful with women we will experience some sort of great joy and enduring pleasure.

What I said may surprise you.

Moreover, it may also surprise you that success with women is not what you REALLY want.

You only want to be in this state because you believe that this state will serve as a bridge between your current less fulfilling state (emptiness, loneliness, despair, etc...) to a different more pleasurable state (satisfaction, fulfillment, and contentment).

Yet, for some reason the state of being successful with women never seems to materialize. The only place where it usually does is in your head.

So, the inevitable question is: why?

Why are you doing everything that you can to achieve success with women yet fail and why there are some guys who treat women badly, yet achieve all the success they want?

Now the simple answer that most dating gurus give to men is that women are attracted to men that are confident and are repulsed by nice men who radiate neediness and lack of self esteem.

This is very true. This is what is actually going on, but how does this help the guys who lack confidence reach the state of success that the confident guys have.

If you have read any of my articles you probably know by now that I don't believe in giving people positive methods to achieve any physiological endeavors in life.

On the contrary, I believe that we have tried all the positive methods to become successful with women for years and we still find ourselves exactly where we started. Very depressed and confused.

So instead of doing what we have always done and expect different results, let's do things differently in order to experience new results.

Let's forget following a positive system, advice, tip, or guru and concentrate our powers on: Negation of false beliefs.

I tried to explain negation of false beliefs in many ways in the past and in this article I will try to explain it through a fun yet informative allegory.

Imagine yourself living on an island.

The island has two sides to it which are separated by a huge river.

The two sides of the island, X and Y, are occupied with people, yet the people from side X cannot visit the people from side Y (and vice versa) because there isn't any bridge or boat which can help them to cross the huge river.

The "X" side of the island is the side where you want to be (a side populated by confident guys who are extraordinary successful with women).

And the "Y" side is where you currently are (a side populated by "nice" guys who aren't successful with women).

You want to move from where you are (Y) to where you think you should be (X).

The problem is, apart from crossing the huge river, is that people from side Y of the island only accept newcomers who ALREADY have a confident mentality like they do.

So when you ask yourself or other people questions like:

- How can I become successful with women? -

- Can you give me 5 ways / tips / strategies,suggestions to get hot girls?

- Do you know how I can get my ex-girlfriend back?

- Why do women always dump me and then go out with jerks that treat them badly?

The answers you get for your questions, as you see, are not important at all.

What is important is that you currently have the kind of mentality which will not give you access to side "X" of the island.

This may be the most important thing I can tell you, don't forget it.

I will repeat it again in different words, because it is so important!

The questions that you ask are much more important than the answers you get.

The "nice" people who occupy side "Y" of the island are always asking these kind of unproductive questions, which show lack of confidence and are always trying to figure out why they are stuck on the "Y" side of the island.

As I said before, you can only be a part of the community of side "X" of the island if you are acting like its inhabitants from the very beginning.

After you become the kind of person who is thinking, speaking, and acting like the people from side "X", you will not have to do anything at all to cross the huge river. You will suddenly find yourself in side "X".

So the next time you have a burring question which you just can't find answer for, stop for a second and ask yourself the following question very seriously:

From which side of the island am I asking this question?

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/dating-tips-and-advice-guys-dont-need-them-to-pick-up-women-589208.html

About the Author

Amir Rimer gives the complete story on how to attract women, using the most groundbreaking, innovative psychological techniques in the world in his new eBook The Dating Doctrine, which has now become available.
To learn more about how to become a women magnet, download the FREE 7 day mini course he has especially prepared for you at the following link:
http://www.yougetgirl.com

How to Maintain a Good Marriage Relationship?

Author: RyuC Chua

Everyone surely has had frustrating hair-pulling days before, whether you are married or not!

Have you ever wished for an extra pair of hands to do all the things you need to do? Be it clearing the laundry basket of its dirty clothes, cleaning the messy rooms, mopping the dirt-stained floor, putting away the toys, sending your children to school, or preparing meals for your family, an extra pair of hands would be nice!

On top of the above chores, if you are holding a job, I would sincerely empathize with you. The physical and mental pressure that you have to bear is definitely not small!

I can imagine that there are days whereby things just do not seem to go smoothly. The alarm clock did not ring when it is supposed to! You are late for a meeting with an important client! Your boss being not in a good mood, made things difficult for you throughout the day! The school called saying your child is having behavioural problems! You have to work over-time, and would not be in time to prepare dinner for your family. When you reached home, tons of household chores are waiting for you! To top it off, you have a difference in opinion with your husband over some mundane issues, with both of you ending up going to bed still angry and not speaking to each other! Wow! What a mess!

In a marriage, efforts have to be made to maintain and strengthen the relationship between husband and wife, or parent and child, just like a seedling needs to be watered for it to blossom. Yes, lots of things are easier said than done! However, if you are not even willing to give it a chance by putting in some effort, things will definitely stay the same!

Below are a few tips for maintaining a marriage relationship that I have gathered over fifteen years of personal experience. I do hope they work for you as well!

1.Sharing

To maintain a good marriage relationship requires a lot of SHARING. A load shared is a load halved. Vice-versa, happiness shared is happiness doubled! For example, if you can get your other half to do household chores together, both of you would be surprised that it could become time well-spent together, gaining a better knowledge of the habits, as well as the likes and dislikes of your spouse.

If your spouse received a piece of good news and shared it with you, it would be most appropriate for you to express your happiness for him/her with a simple hug or a kiss! With a little effort to celebrate in the form of a meal or a small gift, your relationship would be greatly improved.

2.Quality Communication

Quality communication comes about with patience, a listening ear and a sympathetic heart. I do understand that sometimes it is not easy to be patient with one another, especially after a hard day at work! Especially if there are also small kids around the house! However, remember the time when both of you were just getting to know each other? The efforts made then to try to present a good image in front of each other, and the willingness to listen so as to know each other better should also be practiced within a marriage. Try seeing things from his/her perspective, and you would realize that it is not hard to understand the behaviour of your spouse.

Of course, there would be days whereby you know that your patience has reached its limits. Then the best thing to do would be to take a breather from each other. Give each other some private space, then try approaching your loved one when you have cooled down. There is no point in continuing any discussion if both of you are heated up. Throwing ugly words at each other will only deepen your misunderstandings, and not solve any problems. Angry words hurt and leave its mark. Moreover, it will be impossible to take back what is said even if you want to later! So, do not do what you will regret later.

3.Respect

Everyone likes to be respected. Respect your spouse and you will be treated the same by your spouse. If you are married, there must be a couple of things about him/her that have made you agreed to the marriage in the first place. Do not be negative about things he/she likes just because it is not to your preference. Constant arguing will only worsen a marriage relationship. Try to find a mutual ground for compromise. Sometimes it helps to take a step back and look at things from a different angle.

Bear in mind to grasp every available opportunity to show that you care! Be it a cup of coffee in the morning, a call of concern during the workday, or a hug after work would work miracles for a marriage. Marriage is not the end, but the beginning of a long path of finding out more about your spouse, and learning to compromise and live with your differences in life. It is also about going through the ups and downs of life, as well as maturing together with your loved ones. Learn to appreciate the plain presence of your other half, and marriage life might not be as bad as you deem it to be!

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/how-to-maintain-a-good-marriage-relationship-373079.html

About the Author

RyuC Chua is a freelance writer. For more marriage related information, please visit http://www.mymarriageadvice.com

Relationships Site: Good Vs Bad Advice - The Magic of Making Up Review

Author: Richie Trustee

On the Internet you can find many relationships sites offering tips and advice about good and bad relationships. Some are designed for those who are new in a relationship while others are for those who have had a break up and are now making up and trying to work it out. Can you really use these relationships sites to help you fix your relationship?

The information in them can certainly help if you apply it. Obviously some advice is going to better than others. And some of these sites just contain nonsense articles and are designed to get you to buy something.

For super great tips and secrets, read The Magic of Making Up Review by TW Jackson

Don't bother with cutesy sites that have little quizzes and aricles on topics like how to trick your partner or how to cheat and not get caught, etc. Those aren’t for people in serious relationships, or they’re just for humor.

But sites that provide good, sound advice can be very useful. Many of them include the opportunity for people visiting the site to interact on message boards and forums. Testimonials might be available that tell how the sight was helpful.

Just remember to take those testimonials with a grain of salt. Some relationships sites actually make them up or have other people fabricate them, to make themselves look better or to get you to buy something. Read this testimonial about the most real and true relationship guide available on the Internet. Read : The Magic of Making Up Review

The sites that have been put up by actual relationship experts like those who have written extensively on the subject are usually best. If they've written some books and counsel people in mending relationships, they're at least making an effort to provide useful information.

There are other sites, not put out by experts, can also offer very useful information. Some might include advice columns or Q & A pages. Reading about other people's situations can often be helpful. This can allow you to see how others handled a situation and whether the advice might apply to yours.

You might want to avoid relationships sites that guarantee they will rescue your relationship or marriage. People that have broken up and gotten back together know how hard it can be. For a site or individual to tell people that their relationships can definitely be saved is misleading.

If they don't know your particular situation, they can't really make that promise. And even if the details of your situation were known, nothing can guarantee that everything will work out.

The most a website or even an expert can do is provide tools for you to try. You can find out what you need to do to really make it work this time. Then the ball is in your court to use the information to help your situation.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/relationships-site-good-vs-bad-advice-the-magic-of-making-up-review-1432435.html

About the Author

Sites that have a lot of absolute statements, like how something will make him do a certain thing or think a certain way, aren’t being realistic. If you want more practical and useful advice, look for sites that recognize that things may not work out just as planned.

Now, if you want my honest opinion on an AWESOME relationship guide, read TW Jackson - The Magic of Making Up Review now!