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Relationship Advice For Men - What Women Wish You Knew

Author: Joshua Uebergang

Men, you can no longer can club a woman across the head and drag her to your cave. If you want a relationship with a woman, there's some advice you need to follow. When you follow this help, you'll have women walking into your cave at their will.

As hard as it to believe sometimes being a man, women are humans. They make up half of the world's population. And what is it that all humans want in relationships? We all want to feel great. Women especially love being around men who make them feel great. I'm talking at an emotional, not physical, level.

When a woman is talking with her friends, if you made her feel great, she will brag about you. "Well, what did you talk about?" her friends ask. "I don't know. I just felt great!" she replies. If you make people feel great, they don't have to remember what you did, what you said, or how you said it. They will remember how you make them feel.

What's some relationship advice to make women feel great? Contrary to what most communication experts teach, I don't advise men to compliment a woman unless you're clearly in a relationship with her. Giving compliments subtracts from your power, something women wish their man had more of.

One of the best ways to make a woman feel great is to be funny. You don't want to be a clown, because women don't go to the circus for a relationship, but humor is a universally attractive quality. The type of humor I recommend you develop is cocky and funny. It gently teases. One example is saying, "Stop looking at me like a piece of meat", with a sly smile.

Another piece of relationship advice men need to take to have better relationships with women is to stop giving advice. It's advice to stop giving advice.

As men, we feel compelled to solve problems. We fix cars. Repair homes. Recover lost data from computers. And even gives each other advice on careers, dating, and other areas.

It may surprise you that when a woman talks to you about a problem, she isn't after you to solve it. When we apply our problem-solving mindset to relationships with women, they become dejected. They wonder why their man just won't listen. A woman doesn't share her problems to have them solved - she only wants empathy and understanding. We all want to be understood.

The cure to the advice-giving syndrome is to emphatically listen. The active listening skills I encourage you to use in your relationships is not one of silence as you bite your tongue and resist giving advice. Focus on your partner, reflect her words and feeling, and enter her reality. It can be uncomfortable, but she will thank you for it.

Men, follow this free relationship advice and you will develop good relationships with women. Unless you want the police arresting you, put that club away and follow these lessons.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/relationship-advice-for-men-what-women-wish-you-knew-785396.html

About the Author

Joshua Uebergang, aka "Tower of Power", is a young communication skills coach, author, and owner of Tower of Power. Visit his blog and sign-up free to get relationship communcation skills by email, along with blog updates, and more! Go now to Tower of Power.



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Unconditional Love - A Realistic Relationship Goal or a Romantic Fantasy?

Author: Deborrah Cooper

A young woman wrote in to my dating advice column recently and asked me: "What qualities are absolutely essential in a partner or in an ideal relationship? I have a pretty huge list and want to share some of them with you

o affectionate
o unconditional love for each other
o emotional support, connection and harmony
o caring, kind, compassionate
o easygoing, calm
o stability, commitment, loyal
o understanding, accepting (accepts me as I am)
o tolerant
o appreciation and love for each other
o enjoys intimacy regularly
o sense of humor
o positive outlook (happy and optimistic)

I am seeking this man and hope to find this type of love some day. What do you think of my list?"

My response was probably not what she wanted to hear, but with almost 20 years of experience in dating and relationships industry, I know this young lady is headed for disappointment. Her list is created from girlish childhood fantasies of the Knight swooping in to save the fair maiden. Her list is to me nothing but fantasy from a young woman that has obviously never been married.

Hey, I'm not saying that men cannot be honest, loving, committed and many of the things on the list above, don't get me wrong! But real men are not perfect by any means. Even if a guy did possess all of her listed qualities, they won't be in evidence every single day!

He is going to mess up sometimes, piss her off, and definitely not be the man of her dreams. So I can say with confidence that the man she dreams of only exists in soap operas, fairy tales and romance novels. He is not a real man.

If you are passing up great partners and dismissing them as unsuitable while you seek the romantic fantasy of "unconditional love" you need to stop. Take that qualification off your list and get real. Everything has conditions.

And people will stop loving you if you do things on their "crossed the line" list, as well they should! Expecting that you can treat others any way you want and that they will keep loving you anyway is unrealistic.

Why would anyone with good sense continue to love and care for someone that intentionally did something foul and disrespectful, with the full intent of harm or using them?

For instance, a woman who whines and cries claims to still love a man even though he hurt her children or parents, or committed a violent crime against someone's daughter is a fool. That man would have crossed all barriers of decency and humanity and he should be left in the dust.

When involved in any relationship, we must all decide what our bottom line is. Some people will continue to love and support their friends, children and family members even if they do something on the 'crossed off' list.

However, my standard on this issue is this: Anyone that hits me, hurts my child, hurts my Mom or Dad or brothers gets no love from me! You steal my money you are out. You do anything foul and funky with intent to harm me, you are out. And I don't care who you are.

To me, unconditional love under those circumstances makes no sense and means you care more about someone else than you do yourself. Sadly, the attitude of "I hate myself but I love you" goes hand in hand with a damaged sense of self and low self-esteem, which is almost epidemic in our society.

I strongly suggest that all women eliminate the fantasy of unconditional love in their romantic relationships. Establish boundaries for proper treatment and respect and enforce them 100%! NEVER waste your time or your loving heart loving someone that has clearly demonstrated that they do not love you back.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/unconditional-love-a-realistic-relationship-goal-or-a-romantic-fantasy-404911.html

About the Author

(c) 2008 Deborrah Cooper. Deborrah has authored dozens of relationship articles and advice columns on Ask HeartBeat!, which focuses on modern relationships for teens and adults. Her dating guide Sucka Free Love! provides street-smart, hilarious insight into the toughest issues facing singles today. Check out The Sucka Free Dating Radio Talk Show on Wednesday night at 8:00 pm PST.



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Win Ex Back

Want To Win Back Your Ex Girlfriend?

Author: Jane Bufton

If you want to win back your ex-girlfriend, try not to force it to happen. A common problem of men is there irritating actions in forcing girls to come back. Don’t be some kind of a loser like it is the end of the world.

Let your ex-girlfriend have her own space. Try to be nice and gentle like a friend; this is the least you can do. You can also try not to text or see her; it gives her some time to start missing you.

During that given space try to think, what the problem is in your relationship. It is maybe because of you, or because of her. Commonly it is because of both, but don’t worry or try to explain it, just allow both of you some space.

Go there now - Win Back Your Ex Girlfriend

Girls are very sensitive, but be a man who has wide-understanding on women’s sensitivity. As a man, you should lead woman. Don’t keep on asking what they like, try to think and don’t be so lazy! Surprises are more effective than asking, but never try to win her heart by money.  If you see each other, greet her then go.

Confidence has a greater effect on women, and that kind of technique allows women to miss you more. Wait until the time she will communicate with you; this might be the perfect time to invite her to a date – even just a coffee.

Never forget the surprises, and always look good after your break up. Be confident, talk naturally then explain if you have something to explain. Remember you should decide where to go or eat, be a man!

This is a definite way to win back your ex girlfriend.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/breakup-articles/want-to-win-back-your-ex-girlfriend-1771045.html

About the Author

However all of this can go wrong unless you know exactly what to do step by step, day by day. Click this link to discover the killer methods to:
Win Back Your Ex Girlfriend
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 ... love after he had an affair

How to Catch a Cheating Husband

Author: Ling Tong

When you suspect that your husband is having an affair, the first thing you think about is hiring a private investigator. However there is information available about how to catch a cheating husband that doesn’t incur this type of expense. You really need to make yourself familiar with the common signs of a cheating husband and them become more aware of your husband changing habits. First you can do a search online to find out what these signs are if you are not very knowledgeable about the subject. Then you should start looking for the signs and document your findings. You should not make accusations the first time you discover that your husband is displaying any of these signs ?wait to see if it becomes a new habit for him. Once you start looking for telltale signs, you will find them within a short period of time.

 

Start looking at his daily routine and make note of any strong changes that have taken place recently. This can include stopping at the bar for a drink with friends, having late night meetings, missing dinner several times a week because of meetings, an unusual amount of overtime or unplanned business trips. Pay particular attention to the conversations he has with you. Men will drop names of women that they work with from time to time, but if there is one name that seems to crop up more often of late, you may become suspicious of whether this person is a colleague or a lover. Ask questions about his day and look for inconsistencies. He will try to cover his tracks and will let certain things slip and then try to cover them up with a lie. You can catch him at this if you act innocent and concerned about his day.

 

Do you get any different scents of perfume off his clothing or in the car? This is a sign of a cheating husband if that perfume scent is becoming more and more common and it is not the scent of the perfume you wear. You can buy listening devices you can install in the car to pick up any conversation your husband has with a passenger or on the cell phone. If the conversation is on the phone, you will only hear the side of the conversation that takes place in the car but there is usually enough information from this for you to tell whether or not he is talking to his lover and making plans to meet. If you are listening at the right time and get the details, you can catch him in the act by showing up at this location.

 

If your husband is taking a business trip and complains about how boring it will be, why not plan a surprise visit? This is one way of finding out if he has someone else with him. You can also have a friend call the office to find out whether the secretary says he is away on business or that he is on vacation. Then you know he took a vacation without you and lied about it.

 

Monitor his phone calls and try to discretely look over his shoulder when he is online. You can also install spyware on the computer to find out whether or not he has an email account that you are not aware of. With this spyware, you can get his password and then log in to check his messages.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/how-to-catch-a-cheating-husband-585382.html

About the Author

For more information on how to catch a cheating husband,signs of a cheating husband and why men cheat visit http://www.SignsofaCheatingSpouse.net



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Surprising Reasons Why Men Leave (and How to Handle It)

Author: Brenda Shoshanna

After a relationship ends, whether it’s a 20 year marriage or a promising romance, women ask themselves over and over, what went wrong? They ask themselves, their girlfriends and their therapists. Sometimes they even spend weeks and months blaming themselves and become afraid to try again. Once they know what really happened, it’s always easier to move on.

Below are some top reasons men leave and some guidelines on how to handle this.

They’re Waiting For The Perfect Partner

Some men have a secret fantasy which whispers that a perfect partner is somewhere, around the corner, waiting for him. This perfect partner will not only accept him as he is fully, but he’ll finally be able to express the parts of himself that are hidden. She’ll bring out the best in him. Rather than criticize and make demands, the perfect partner will give unconditionally and fulfill his every need. This fantasy should not be discounted, as it fuels much of this man's inner life. When a woman understands this fantasy fully, she has a secret for helping the man really thrive.

They Hear A Call To Adventure

As soon as some men see a relationship as stifling his basic need for adventure, he can feel himself to be trapped in a prison without bars. Many men then blame the relationship for the dilemma he is in. They do not realize that their true need is to find adventure in the relationship. A woman who does best in this kind of relationship is one who provides challenge.

They Suffer From A Fear Of Commitment

The fear of commitment is widely misunderstood. Commitment is inevitable when a man is living from the truth of who he is. When a man, however, is in a relationship out of obligation, guilt, on or to fulfill a false sense of self-esteem, no real commitment is possible. If he’s not committing, it’s because he doesn’t feel things are right for him.

They Fear That They Can’t Satisfy The Woman

There are some women who can never be satisfied no matter how much a man gives or tries to please. Some men become tied up in knots in these relationships and start to feel terrible about themselves. No matter how hard they try, they can’t get the approval they are hungry for. Some just live for those rare moments when they are acknowledged and thanked.

He’s Acting Out The Repetition Compulsion

The Repetition Compulsion is the unconscious compulsion to repeat a painful situation or relationship over and over, in the hopes it will turn out differently this time. Usually each time is worse, brings more pain and disappointment. Even in the rare instances when the person gets what he wants, the original hunger does not subside. The only solution to this compulsion is to go back to the original trauma, face it fully and work it out.

He’s Involved With The Ghost Of A Past Relationship

These Ghosts are memories, dreams and longings that linger from past relationships, which have been finished but are not over. A man can hold onto the memory of a former wife or lover and idealize her to such an extent, it prevents him from being available to anyone in the present. These memories can also become projected on the current relationship. These men must learn to say forgive the past, say good-bye, and develop the courage to love again.

Here are some Touchstones, (guidelines) for both women and men to help understand relationships better and behave in a way that is helpful for all.

Touchstones For Women

- Realize the turbulence a man goes through often has nothing to do with you - and cannot be avoided.

- Give him space to discover himself, without guilt. His changes do not mean he does not love you. Allow him to be all that he is. Acceptance is love.

- Get busy becoming all the person you can be too. There is nothing worse for a relationship than a man feeling you are clinging to him for your life.

Touchstones For Men

- Restlessness and painful feelings come so you can understand yourself better. Don’t blame them on the relationship. This is not a time to run away, but stay put and understands what is going on inside.

- While you are unsettled and confused is not the best time to act. Choices made during this time are often ruled by feelings and needs from the past.

- Make sure you help the woman realize what you are going through. Do not blame her for it. Be patient with her and yourself.

- Understand that craving other women can become an addiction and escape from intimacy, bringing only more pain and repetition in its wake.

Cc/Dr Brenda Shoshanna/2007

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/surprising-reasons-why-men-leave-and-how-to-handle-it-243912.html

About the Author

Hear men tell you in their own words why they left and what makes a relationship work in eye-opening book on modern relationships - Why Men Leave, http://www.whymenleave.com. Top psychologist,speaker, mediator,and author offers unique guidelines and instructions. Contact at mailto: mailto:topspeaker@yahoo.com. Get free ezine and articles http://www.brendashoshanna.com/ Go to: http://www.whymenleave to get your copy right now.


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Why Women Ruin Relationships By Talking Too Much

Author: Deborrah Cooper

Woman complain frequently about male/female communication. "Men don't communicate" these ladies say in frustration. Women complain that men give one-word answers, don't elaborate and tell the entire story in a play by play fashion, and that it feelings like "pulling teeth" to get information out of them.

Being Like A Man Is Not Always A Bad Thing!

Women operate on a different dynamic and love to share their feelings, experiences and thoughts with others. I think this female style of communication is a way that bonds us and brings us closer to others. Which means this communication style is fine with other women when we get together and talk about family and work. But it is absolutely positively the wrong way to communicate with your romantic partner when it comes to the sexual pleasures you've enjoyed before he came on the scene!

Are All The Mysterious Women Dead?

"She possesses an air of mystery." Sadly, that trait is one many women have completely abandoned. In their quest to "be honest" women feel it necessary need to tell their man every thought that passes through their head, and every single thing they've ever done in this life and those previous. In other words, women blab and share wayyyy too much information.

Guys avoid those types of disclosure like the plague. Their thinking is if you haven't asked a specific question, it isn't important enough to bring up, and it's probably not in their best interest to do so.

Men want things in their relationships to be smooth and easy and pleasant. Smart men know that telling their new woman how great their ex was in bed is not something she needs to know. They know women aren't happy hearing that type of news, and there will be some serious unpleasant moments that follow the delivery! Men are smart enough to know that a female coworker's breast augmentation and how much hotter she looks now is not something their woman needs to know either. Women should adopt a similar policy.

Keep The Past Where It Belongs... In The Past!

Recently a letter came into my advice column from a 35 year old woman that had been introduced by her Mom to a nice physician, formerly from her neighborhood. Though he seemed to be somewhat of a braggart, the two got along well and things looked like they were going someplace.

One day he mentioned that he was going to get a haircut in the old neighborhood, and she volunteered that she had gone out to dinner a few times with the owner of that same barbershop. No relationship, nothing sexual, just out to dinner twice.

After this revelation the young Dr. went to the barber and inquired about his interaction with the woman in question. The barber embellished the interaction and represented the relationship as more than it had been, much to the young doctor's chagrin. Feeling that his reputation would be at risk from this association, he immediately broke off the budding relationship.

Why?

He knows how men are. He knew that the other men in the shop would be trading jokes and stories about sexual activities with his new girl, and that he didn't want to endure the subsequent embarrassment.

Why did this young woman not keep her mouth closed? What benefit did she think would be gained by bringing up ancient history? Why talk about something that involved just a couple of dates that took place years ago and led to nothing?

The boyish competitiveness and desire to bring a man with higher social standing and more money down a peg or two is what was behind this little drama.

Understanding men's egos, the dynamic under which men compete and the manner in which men judge women's suitability as a steady girlfriend and/or wife should be enough impetus to keep your lips closed.

However, if you plan to marry, full disclosure should be expected by your fiancee and provided on about matters vital to the marriage. Openness on subjects such as debts, health concerns, child support and visitation, and income are mandatory, but that is really all that is needed.

In conclusion, think before you open your mouth and "share" information with your man that he won't be able to handle. Blabbing every detail about your past interactions with other men will do nothing positive for your new relationship. Every woman past the age of 21 has a past of some sort. The men that come into your life need to accept the woman that you are, take you as you come and love you for exactly who and what you are right now.

Your past, with all your mistakes, challenges, and experiences together created the fascinating creature that he has fallen in love with. Your past should be something you keep to yourself and reflect on in old age with a enigmatic smile. It should be remembered and respected, but never trotted out for critical review and comment by every guy you date.

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/why-women-ruin-relationships-by-talking-too-much-370906.html

About the Author

(c) 2008 Deborrah Cooper. Deborrah has authored dozens of relationship articles and advice columns on Ask HeartBeat!, which focuses on modern relationships for teens and adults. Her dating guide Sucka Free Love! provides street-smart, hilarious insight into the toughest issues facing singles today. Check out The Sucka Free Dating Radio Talk Show on Wednesday night at 8:00 pm PST.


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Ten Cool Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend

Author: Jacqui Darbyshire

Especially in a new relationship, getting to know your boyfriend is something you obviously want to do. But rather than interrogating them with serious questions, why not put some fun into it, and take advantage of these 10 cool questions to ask your boyfriend, to see what he has to say!

Being in a relationship is all about learning about each other, and how to communicate with each other. If you are able to keep the light-hearted, you will find that you will learn a lot about them, and gain a greater understanding of the type of person they really are.

So here are 10 cool questions to ask your boyfriend, so that you can get to know each other better:

1.   What is your favourite food (keep this in mind for future special occasions!)?

2.   How would you describe yourself to me in one sentence?

3.   What is the most thoughtful thing you have ever done for your mother?

4.   Apart from me (!), who is your favourite person in the entire world?

5.   What is your favourite thing about me?

6.   What is the most important thing you would like me to know about you?

7.   If there is one thing about me that you could change, what would it be and why?

8.   What is your biggest goal in life?

9.   If you suddenly had the means to do what ever you wanted, what is the first thing you would do?

10. If I were to be your slave for one day, what are the things you would make me do? (Ok, this one could get very naughty, but it’s a fun question to ask!)

All good relationships are based on communicating well, and this will be a great start to get you both talking about your hopes and dreams, how you feel about each other, and what you would like to do in your lives.

These questions should not be asked like an interrogation, but maybe dropped into conversation as you talk about other topics. They are meant to be light-hearted, but we'll definitely help you to get to know him a little better.

Once you know a little bit more about him and what he likes, this will also help you to come up with gift ideas as well, especially if your relationship is a long-term one - and he will never guess that this was ever your motive!

These 10 cool questions to ask your boyfriend will definitely spice up any conversation you are having with your boyfriend, and you never know, you may gain a great deal of knowledge about the workings of his mind! That's not a bad thing when you are getting to know somebody new.

Written by: Jacqui Darbyshire

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Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/ten-cool-questions-to-ask-your-boyfriend-1108995.html

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Hope you enjoy my articles, you can read more articles on my website www.cupids4me.com, you never know you might find your love online.


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