Posts Tagged ‘Infidelity’
September 12th, 2010 | 
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Getting Over an Affair
Author: Janice Townsend
Getting over an affair is extremely difficult because the impact is so immense.
The effects include depression, hyper anxiety, weight loss, lack of sleep, anger, and a feeling that is closely aligned to bereavement. In many ways it is a bereavement, because it is the loss of a loved one.
Perhaps the most astounding thing about infidelity is how little the general public know about its impact on the victim. This hasn't been helped by the general media who portray it as though it were light entertainment.
Non the less, that is the what the victim has to deal with whilst they are getting over an affair, and that may feel like a very lonely place to be. It is as though the only people who really understand are those who have been through it, and that may well be true.
For that reason, many internet forums offer some kind of solace for those who are getting over an affair, although sometimes the best advice isn't offered there. For that, the councellor may be a wiser choice, there are several guide books available by experienced advisors, and more recently we have seen the introduction of hypnotherapy CD's. .
There are several suggestions that I would like to offer which the victim of an affair may like to consider.
Meditation can unify one's energy and thus bring about some much-needed peace and calm as you are getting over an affair.
EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) is a system of tapping on various body parts and consequently releases trapped energy. You can find many examples of how to do it on YouTube, and I think you will be surprised how powerful it can be.
For getting over an affair, exercise is a great way to release stress and where possible it would advisable. If you don't feel able to exercise then you should at least go for long walks.
You would also gain some respite by simply talking your problems through with family and friends. Seek out the ones who are most calm about your situation and who can simultaneously provide you with love and support.
In the first phase of getting over an affair, you will be in considerable shock. This will eventually ease down, but it may be extremely disorientating, to say nothing of painful, in the early stages.
It is also very likely that you will experiece all manner of dreadful thoughts and images that will put you under immense stress. You can change this, by using techniques from NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), and Hypnotherapy recordings.
Getting over an affair will very likely take you many months and possibly years, but it is possible. Some people manage to rebuild their relationships, whilst others must seperate. Whatever the outcome, the victim can find many sources of assistance and should actively seize them in an endeavour for future happiness.
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/infidelity-articles/getting-over-an-affair-758780.html
About the Author
Janice Townsend is a contributor to Getting Over An Affair
Posted in emotional affairs | 
Tags: Adultery, affair, Affairs, Betrayal, cheating, Infidelity | 
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Why Do Men Cheat and How To Keep Your Lover Faithful. How To Stop a Break Up
Author: Sam Taylor
Why Do Men Cheat? Why Do Women Cheat? How Do You Keep Your Lover Faithful?
Is it Possible to Stay Faithful and NOT Cheat? Is this possible?
Will Most Likely Put You Into Shock!
These are questions every person in heart break asks themselves when they are in a relationship that is facing a break up due to one or both lovers cheating or being unfaithful. Why Men cheat is a question not easily answered. How to keep your lover from cheating and to make him or her stay faithful is another issue all together. Lets starrt by addressing the first question.
Why Do Men Cheat On Women? -- Each person will have his own reason but the majority of men have it built in to spread their seed as much as possible. Consider it like going on a diet and not eating the foods you desire. You feel deep inside that it is against the grain and not right. many men feel this way when they try to stay faithful and not cheat on their woman.
For some men, they cheat out of emotional needs that must be filled. Other men cheat for the physical aspect. The bottom line is...
A LOT OF MEN CHEAT!
So, the most important question within the problem is...
How do you STOP a man from cheating or PREVENT your man from cheating in the first place?
Statistics are very scary on the % of men who actually are unfaithful. It is a very good idea to find out how to keep him from cheating.
HOW DO YOU GO AGAINST NATURE YOU ASK?
The answer will actually shock you. Are you ready to open your mind to new and dynamic methods?
One of the Best and most EFFECTIVE methods to prevent a person from being unfaithful is Binding Love Spell Energy!
Yes, more and more people are turning to the safe, natural and EFFECTIVE method of Binding Energies to keep their lovers faithful and happy and prevent any future break ups or infidelity.
How do you find these "Binding Love Spell Castings" you ask?
They are all over the web actually.
It is VERY safe to use Love Spell Binding energies to keep a lover from going a stray. It is not brain washing, the actual process is a fantastic art form that will amaze you.
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/infidelity-articles/why-do-men-cheat-and-how-to-keep-your-lover-faithful-how-to-stop-a-break-up-1506507.html
About the Author
To find out more about Energies to keep your lover from cheating and to keep them faithful visit http://www.ExtremeSpells.com
Sam Taylor
Why Is There Infidelity In My Life?
Author: Len Stauffenger
Was your divorce caused by infidelity? It's one of the most painful experiences to experience. If divorce is new in your life, you might want to avoid my words, least of all agree with them. We enter into marriage with such high hopes for fidelity tattooed across our minds and hearts and we vow to be faithful to our mate. "And then something happens." The causes of infidelity in a marriage belong to both the husband and the wife, regardless of which one was actually unfaithful. If you don't admit to your role in the experience, you are bound to repeat it, so I'd strongly urge you to read about these ideas with an open mind in order to prevent this from ever happening to you again. Unfaithfulness, or having an affair, is often viewed as a betrayal of the marriage commitment. If the affair was physical or only inside your mind, both these kinds of infidelity create pain for the other spouse who looks at either one of them as some form of betrayal and breaking of the marriage vows. I can tell you that the person who is performing the infidelity is doing so for themselves, and not to go against their spouse. The infidel thinks they have valid reasons to blame their spouse, for example, the spouse has neglected them in their marriage; their spouse spends more time with the kids; their spouse has quit communicating openly with them. These are just some of the excuses for blaming someone else for what is really their infidelity, but if you are the non-offender, do look at these and see if you do any of them. The unfaithful spouse frequently works from a perspective of being jealous of his spouse for a variety of reasons, some of them too silly to even mention. Are you one of those who accepts excuses like this? Maybe an honest look at your commitment to your relationship with your spouse is due. Infidelity sometimes stems from judgments that are made about the spouse: you might think that they are not a good wage earner, so you're justified to fool around; she might be a plain Jane, and since you're such a prince, you feel justified to have an affair. He might uphold a higher moral standard than you do, which makes you think it's okay to lie and cheat on him because that'll show him! These are all mistaken justifications and need the light of honesty shined on them. You might be outgrowing the relationship but you stay in it because by now, you are financially involved to the hilt and it would be a financial smack in the jaws to divorce, so why not just have a fling to cut the boredom, add a little spice, and basically (in your mind only) honor the commitment because, after all, "It's only sex, not love." So many people do not buy that line of BS. You might work with someone who is extremely attractive and what began as innocent flirting could end up as a full blown affair. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction and what might feel great now, could end up as guilt or shame later on, so take the long view. Or is this just an act of revenge because you are aging and your spouse is holding her own a bit better than you? Have you considered what are you teaching your children? Is your example good for them? Don't think that they are quite young now and are unaware of what you're doing. They'll find out sooner or later. Don't you want to be their Big Daddy for always and forever? Making it through the other side of an affair leaves both members of the marriage shaken. I found some wonderful vulnerability quizzes on the internet that you can take to see where you stand in this sensitive situation. http://tinyurl.com/67y9au I hope and pray that you never experience infidelity again. Divorce isn't fun, and if you wise up, you'll no longer have to bear the blame.
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/home-and-family-articles/why-is-there-infidelity-in-my-life-791346.html
About the Author
In his book "Getting Over It: Wisdom for Divorced Parents," Len Stauffenger shares his simple wisdom gleaned from his divorce with his daughters and with you. Len is a Success Coach and an Attorney. You can purchase Len's book and it's accompanying workbook at http://www.wisdomfordivorcedparents.com
How to Avoid Being a Victim of the Liar
Author: Jim DeSantis
Although honesty is generally taught as the best policy, I would propose that it is the only policy to follow in 99% of cases. The other 1% could be called "white lies.” How are you to know the difference, that is, when someone is telling the whole truth as opposed to a white lie? Here are some tips that will help you spot a liar.
There was an old Hollywood movie starring Charles Bronson as a buffalo hunter and Will Sampson as an Indian Chief. They are in a cave together, hunting the same killer white buffalo, when they engage in a conversation about truth. Bronson, known to the Indians as "the shooter" because he is a skilled hunter, has his version of the truth and the Chief has his. The Chief asks - "Tell me Shooter, what is the true truth?" I ask you the same question. For me, the true truth is the whole truth, no shading. What is it for you?
As we go about our interaction with each other, the white lie is employed more than any other form of communication with those closest to us. We are more apt to shade the truth in order to avoid hurt feelings or, when we know a person really well, we tell a white lie because we know they really don't want the true truth. They have their version of the true truth and that's the version they want to hear.
When we deal with strangers, telling a lie is easy because we likely will never see them again but what about that stranger we may see again? You need to decide if what you are lying about is worth what you will gain as opposed to the potential consequences if your lie is discovered. It is a personal decision. You need to be realistic with yourself. It is easy to become a compulsive liar and ruin your life. Under what circumstances are you willing to risk damaging relationships, reputation, and future opportunities. Ask yourself. Do the benefits of telling the lie outweigh the risks?
For example: A teen boy tells his parents he's going to the movies with a friend but he's really going to a concert with his girlfriend. Logically, the parents are going to ask what the movie was about and if he enjoyed it. Now, beforehand, the teen could Google a summary of what was in the movie; along with the climax so he can be ready for the questions. Such a young man may not consider the consequences if he is caught in the lie. He does not realize that his parents will be emotionally hurt by his lie and will take a long time before ever trusting him again. His lie has destroyed the parent-child relationship for a long time to come.
Telemarketing has taught us that it's relatively easy to lie to someone over the phone because the sense of personal connection is very small. You can't see them; they can't see you. As a result, you are less likely to feel guilty and, therefore, give visual clues that you may be deviating from your normal behavior. If you were closer to the person physically, you would have a greater personal connection. Consequently, you would be more likely to reveal, in some way, that you are engaging in deceptive behavior.
The same reasoning applies to being close to a person psychologically. If you try to lie to your girlfriend or boyfriend, there are numerous psychological pressures. For example, you'll think about what happens if you get caught, feel guilty about lying to someone you care about and it will be more difficult to focus on mimicking your normal behavior. This phenomenon is often called "liars’ remorse," and it's usually what people are talking about when they say a liar "wants to get caught." Those closest to us know when we are lying and when we are shading the truth a bit.
Most strangers will not have a clue if you are an accomplished liar. It takes years, by the way, to develop a liar's mentality. An amateur liar will not look you right in the eye when lying. They may touch their head with their hand, or hold their palms up as they spin the lie. These are both giveaways. An accomplished liar does the opposite. They look you in the eye, their hands at their side. An amateur liar will use the strongest adjectives and a voice level that are above normal pitch and speed. A friend of mine says - "I can tell when someone's lying. They talk faster than I can listen."
Most professionals employ specific tactics to catch liars. The cops will make small talk with you to establish what your "normal" behaviors are. When they get down to the serious subject matter, they look for cracks in that normal behavior. Polygraph machines work the same way. There are mental and physical drives that can be detected by skilled interviewers, as well as machines.
There are many more subliminal messages people send when lying. Do some research and learn what they are and how to avoid them.
Jim DeSantis
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/how-to-avoid-being-a-victim-of-the-liar-436795.html
About the Author
Jim DeSantis is a retired investigative journalist who is now a full time blogger. Grab Jim's Free Report "How To Spot A Liar" (click here). No email is required. Visit Jim's blog about the Workplace (click here) for more free information.
Posted in Get an ex back |
Tags: Boss, boyfriend, family, friendship, girlfriend, Home-family, Husband, Infidelity, Job, relationships, Unfaithful, wife, Work |
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