Posts Tagged ‘dating help’
September 12th, 2010 | 
Author:  |
FREE Report:
|
Affairs and Your Marriage: Why Do Women Cheat?
Author: Brandon Grittini
Infidelity is on the rise. We hear about it more and more each day, especially from celebrities. Many people, when you think about cheating spouses, automatically think that it is a husband cheating on a wife. This, however, is not always the case.
Men are not the only philanderers. Women are also committing adultery. In fact, some studies suggest that almost 50% of married women have had sex outside of their marriage. Cookie Magazine did a study back in May that found 34% of moms admitted to having an affair after they had children, and another 53% say they have thought seriously about having an affair.
This says that it's not just men having affairs. We hear all of the time about why men affairs, but women having affairs never seems to be a focus. So, why do women have affairs?
Women Cheat For Emotional Reasons
Whether it's a lack of communication in their marriage, a need for an emotional connection they are not receiving, or just the desire to feel wanted and beautiful, women are cheating to fill emotional voids their husbands have left them with.
Women also crave the need for security. Men are the blanket that provides this security, and if you as a husband aren't satisfying this need, she will seek it elsewhere. As women age, they tend to feel less and less secure. They begin to question the way they look, feel less attractive, and unable to do things they did when they were younger. Even if these things aren't true, women tend to convince themselves that they are.
If you are not reassuring your wife that she is beautiful and important to you, you are putting your relationship at risk.
Other Reasons Women Cheat
*Sense of Loneliness
*Insecurity
*Disappointment with their spouse
*Depression
*Lack of Romance
Profile of a Female Cheater
Now that we've covered some reasons why women cheat, lets profile the typical female philanderer.
*Women tend to choose partners who are also married. This offers some safety for them, as they have less of a concern to worry about STD's. They also don't have to worry about the "secret" getting out, as the married man also would have no benefit of leaking the truth. Last, it puts a limit on the amount of time they can spend with their lover if he is also married.
*Women who cheat on their spouse are more likely to be a full-time worker. Men in the workplace can tend to make the women feel important, if she is doing a good job, notice the woman, and take an interest in her.
*Women don't jump into affairs. They tend to know the person they are cheating with for a couple of months or more before they actually cheat on their spouse. This proves the stat from Cookie Magazine that 53% of married women with children say they've contemplated an affair.
*They don't always want a "bad boy". In fact, They are looking for the "ideal husband", someone who can provide the security, communication, financial, and emotional needs they currently lack.
Myths About Adultery
As you learn more and more about affairs, you will begin to understand their true meaning and place for existence. You will also be able to dispel some common myths.
1. An affair can help your troubled marriage. No, it cannot help. It will only worsen the problems you are already having. What it can do is open your spouse's eyes to the trouble and ignite a plan to address those problems.
2. Bad Sex Causes People to Have an Affair. No, this is not true either. Sex is just that, sex. It is all the same, really, until you add emotion to it. Sex can become worse if one person feels it is a problem, an insecurity, and begins to turn sex into what it never should be, a performance. Great sex comes from sharing yourself, mentally and emotionally, with your partner, which creates a deep trust between the two of you.
3. Affairs Can Last Forever. False. Affairs die for the same reasons marriages do, the lack of intimacy. If you are having an affair and think it is a wonderful relationship, it is because you are hiding the imperfections from one another. You never truly get to know the real person you are with. If you care enough about getting to know someone, get to know your spouse. Affairs lack the emotion necessary to sustain long term.
What To Do If You Are Tempted To Cheat
I hope you are not tempted to cheat, but if you are, think about it first. Typically when you have this feeling, there are problems going on in your relationship. Try addressing those problems and see if you and your spouse can work through them.
Learn to communicate better with your spouse. Create a transparency, where you know everything about your spouse, and they know everything about you. Spend time together every day, and learn something new about them. Find new activities that you both can enjoy together. Never stop dating your spouse!
Women really crave the emotional things, so men really need to work at giving them those things. If you are a women, you need to share with your husband what you are craving and lacking. If you are a man, work on satisfying those needs. If you do, you can live a happy marriage together!
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/affairs-and-your-marriage-why-do-women-cheat-547137.html
About the Author
If you feel like you have a cheating wife then visit our site to help with recovering from an affair.
Posted in emotional affairs | 
Tags: Adultery, affair, cheating spouse, Cheating Wife, dating help, divorce, Infidelity, marriage advice | 
10 Comments »
5 WARNING SIGNS YOU’LL NEVER MEET SOMEONE
Author: Tonja Weimer
Do you worry that you will never meet someone? Have you tried to date, but nothing ever works out? There are warning signs that tell you why this happens. Do you know what the signs are?
WARNING SIGN #1 Disastrous Dates
The first warning sign that you won’t meet someone is when you have a date that you think is a disaster and you focus on the “failure” of it. You may keep trying to date, but each person seems worse than the last one. You consider this a sure sign that you will be alone the rest of your life, that you are not attractive enough to get the one you want, and, most of all, the one you want doesn’t even exist!
WHAT YOU CAN DO: Shift your thinking from failure to success. You haven’t “lost” anything except some expectations. Look for what you learned. You have gained insight, clarity, and knowledge. You can use these lessons on the path to your True Love.
CONCLUSION: Your single life is not a contest—it’s an adventure. Stop looking at it like it is one impossible event after another. As long as you think of it as a win-lose, you will not feel successful, or brave enough to take the necessary steps to meet someone. You are allowing your creative mind to dip into the negative zone, turning a disappointing date into an act of rejection. Get a grip. Don’t talk yourself into feeling rejected. No one rejects you but your own mean inner critic.
WARNING SIGN #2: Interpreting Every Date As A Rejection
WHAT TO DO: It takes a victim and a victimizer, carefully orchestrating their misery, to be successful in creating the game of rejection. If you don’t play the game, you can’t be rejected. You are not rejected if someone shares that you two don’t seem compatible. Say, “Thank you,” let go of whatever you were expecting, and move on. How do you keep your dance card full so one less name on it will barely be missed? Get out often, get out more, and get out and be friendly.
CONCLUSION: If you make a plan for your social life, you don’t have to wait for love to “just happen.” Follow the plan, and plan for volume, so you won’t fall into the “I’ve been rejected” pit.
WARNING SIGN #3: Jealousy Consumes You When Someone Else Falls In Love
WHAT TO DO: When you feel jealous of anyone for ANYTHING, look to see what you have not done for you. Jealousy occurs when we feel deprived, or helpless, or like we are not enough. If you are jealous of another person, ask yourself:
- What have I done lately to meet someone? Do I get out whenever possible, tell lots of people I would like to meet someone, and stay friendly, reaching out to others? Be honest. How much have you really done?
- What can I do to feel better about myself? Need a counselor, exercise program, or financial adviser?
- What can I do today to empower myself? Have I de-cluttered recently, eliminated what I have been putting up with, or found something to do that I LOVE?
CONCLUSION: Jealousy happens when you are feeling empty and unfulfilled. No one can make you jealous if your life is brimming with good things and if you know you have the power to create everything you want.
WARNING SIGN #4: Looking For Someone To Make You Happy
WHAT TO DO: Look to see where you can make yourself happy. You may think all your fears will melt and your problems will be handled when The Perfect One enters your life. But if you have this state of mind, when you find The One and continue not to be happy, you may think it is the other person’s fault. True—the other person may be a jerk or jerkette—but your unhappiness started with you. Pull your life together, do things that make you proud, and then you will attract someone like you.
CONCLUSION: Happiness is not an elusive balloon—one minute you have a hold of it and the next, it slips from your grasp. You don’t have to go chasing after it. It’s in you. No one can give it to you, and no one can take it away. You give it to yourself.
WARNING SIGN #5: Projection Onto The Other Person
WHAT TO DO: This is a common mistake singles make. Many people who live alone want to meet someone so much, when they finally get a date, they read all kinds of values and character traits into the person that just aren’t there. Eventually, they wind up being angry because he or she didn’t live up to their expectations.
CONCLUSION: Be careful when meeting your future dates that you don’t “make it up” they are so perfect, you miss the red flags of danger.
These are the five warning signs that can become your new guide to find romance. Give them a try. You deserve to find your love.
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/5-warning-signs-youll-never-meet-someone-1147981.html
About the Author
About Tonja Weimer:
· Columnist: Weekly syndicated singles and dating columnist (over four million readers in the U.S. and Canada)
· Media: Coverage on TV, including CNN’s ShowBiz Today; rave reviews in USA Today, Entertainment Weekly, Publisher’s Weekly
· Author: NBC/USA TV Network, selected author for articles on dating and singles for website
· Articles: In House Beautiful, New Woman, GRAND, and other national magazines
· Coach: Master Certified Singles Relationship Coach; Associate Certified Life Coach; International Coach Federation; Relationship Coaching Institute; Institute for Life Coach Training
· Keynote Speaker: Regional, National and International conferences in U.S., India and Europe
· Academic: BA; MA in Human Development; U.S. Dept of Mental Health full fellowship
· Published Author: 7 Books(Fingerplays for Children; Creative Movement for Children, etc) winning over 25 awards.
Visit Tonja's website for more exciting dating tips!
Singles Dating Tips Online
Posted in Get an ex back |
Tags: dating, dating advice, dating help, Finding Love, love, meet someone, relationships, tonja weimer. |
No Comments »
